True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager