.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
