You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
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I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
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Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.