Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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