I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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