U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
