I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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