Where are you?
In a non slutty way
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
