textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
