i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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