youre lurking in front of me
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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