If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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