I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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