I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
