I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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