This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
