M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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