Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
