yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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