For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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