More tranny stories later!
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
