try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize