Apparently you make a good broom.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize