You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
