guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize