you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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