Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
