I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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