My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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