I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
