i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
