Having a random hookup so left but love u
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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