I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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