i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize