So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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