I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize