It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
