I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize