yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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