Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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