wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize