So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
