the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Randomize