I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hospital has no fireball
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize