Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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