Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize