Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
