Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
