There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
