he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
