To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize