In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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