okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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