ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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